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She looks like she could have been happy in another life

(happy in a better life)

Identity bonds
Posting Access:
All Members , Moderated
This kind of goes hand in hand with a lot of the soulbonding communities, though it's a little bit different.

Have you ever read a book (or seen a movie, or watched a tv show...) and felt a connection to one of the characters? Has that connection been so strong that it became almost impossible to differentiate between you and that character?
Or, if you're a writer, have you ever felt such a connection with one of your characters that after a while you felt like you were writing an autobiography, though it's about something you haven't experianced in this life?
You're not crazy, really. Chances are you're experiancing "identity bonding". Also referred to as "fictionkin" and "otakukin" (though the latter isn't such a nice term I hear). It's basically the belief that you share a soul with a character from a book/movie/tvshow/etc. A belief that you are the same person.

Now I personally don't feel it's my place to tell you what identity bonding is for everyone. All I know is my own personal experiance (and in the end isn't that all any of us really know).
Some people may get the sense that they were this character in another life.
Others feel that when reading (or writing) the character bonded so strongly to them that they became one person.
Some feel that maybe they are that character in another dimension.

There are so many different experiances people have had and so many different explanations that there's really not anywhere near enough room to fit everyone's experiance in this little box (hence starting the community in the first place).

I'm a member of a lot of multiplicity, soulbonding and general plurality communities and there have been a number of people (myself included) that experiance this, and I can't find a community with this specific purpose so I figured I'd start one.

For now, the community is open membership and will hopefully remain so unless there is a problem with troll activity. All posts are set as friends only.

There are, however, a few rules one must abide by if they want to join (I know, I know, the dreaded rules section *cue scary music*).

-RESPECT: It's basic common sense, guys. This is dealing with a pretty deep topic, and it's very important to the members. If you don't like, for instance, Harry Potter and someone posts saying they have an identity bond with an HP character, don't insult them or the movies/books that have affected them the way they did. Unless someone directly asks "how do you feel about this person", don't give them crap. Along those lines, if you think someone's lying, or fangirling, that's fine. Just don't bring out the drama. You don't have to believe everyone's experiances but you do have to respect them. This isn't a debate community or a "more identity bonded than thou" community, so keep the drama and flaming away.
-Privacy. What is said in the community is kept in the community. That means if you're caught screencapping posts/comments, or spreading other people's personal things to other communities or people online you're immediately banned. I don't care why you're doing it, no excuses, immediate ban. I want this to be as safe and secure as an internet forum can be, and that means that if you want to take part in this you have to respect the other members' right to privacy. If they want their personal beliefs put out there they'll do it themselves.
-No claims. You don't have a claim on a particular character. If we have a couple Harry Potters, that's fine. There does not need to be a battle to see who is "the real one". (While we'd all love to see Harry Potter battle an evil twin ha) and if someone else come in with a belief that they are the same person you feel connected to, there's no need to fight over it, no need to demand proof or anything like that. You don't have to believe them, but respect them (*points to first rule*)
-Fangirls/RPers. This is NOT a fandom community and it is not a roleplaying community. This is real people with real beliefs. This isn't the place to find RPers for a community, this isn't the place to post bunches of pictures of how pretty Sephiroth is, this is to share, ask questions and discuss about identity bonding.
-This isn't a disorder-support group. Let me explain. It IS a support group, but it's a support group for identity bonders to get help, advice, or just to discuss their situation with others with a like (or open) mind. While multiples are of course allowed (a number of SB/IBers also fall under that category) but it's not a psychology community. (telling us that we need meds/therapy- a big no no), it's not a depression support group. If you have relevant questions about depression and such you're welcome to ask, but the point is to try and stay on topic. (If you're unsure about whether something is on topic or not- ask the mod).
-No advertising. I shouldn't even have to say it, but unfortunately I do. PLEASE don't join and promote communities that aren't related to soulbonding/identity bonding/multiplicity/plurality in some way. No ratings communities especially, no fandom communities. If you have a question as to whether your community is related or not, contact the mod (my email is at the bottom of the userinfo)
-No grammar-nazis. There is absolutely no need to nitpick on someone's grammar and writing abilities. If they wrote "your" instead of "you're" that's just too bad. This is the internet, and yes people make mistakes. You just have to deal with that. If you have nothing constructive to say as a reply just don't say anything. It shouldn't affect you at all if someone misspells a word and frankly it's off topic, not to mention incredibly arrogant and just obnoxious. If you want to prove that you're smarter than everyone else, do so in your own posts and actions rather than in critiquing everyone else's.

-For non identitybonded observers: You're welcome here if you're curious about the topic, but you have to follow the rules, you have to be respectful and accepting that this is what we believe. That means no demanding proof, no namecalling, psychological diagnosing or play-therapy ("WTF were you traumatized as a kid??"), nothing of that sort. Again, this isn't a debate community, it's for discussion and support. You're welcome to ask questions, express confusion, and get involved as much as you feel comfortable. Just be respectful and, again, remember that not only are you dealing with people's beliefs, but their identity and their general sense of self. That's not something to take lightly.

-Remeber to all members (and a lot of people forget this) the members of this community (and every internet forum really) are still people. They're living, breathing, feeling beings. Treat them with that in mind. I think a lot of us (myself included) have forgotten that at times. Over the internet, to most people, all you are is your screen name, your icon and whatever you're typing. Please remember when you're leaving comments (or even making general posts) that there are other people reading this, replying to this and taking part in it. Think "would I say this to that person if I ran in to them on the street?" when you're talking to them. (No, obviously that's not a rule as I am not george bush and can not make attempts to dictate what goes through your head. It's just a general reminder to all members to treat the other members like people, not just ones and zeroes on a computer screen).

I can't be on the look-out constantly, I can't read every single reply so I may miss a few things. If you feel someone has broken a rule, let me know in case I miss it (my email address is at the bottom of the info). The rules are pretty plain, and most of them are generic livejournal community rules so it shouldn't be that hard not to break them. All rules (unless specified otherwise) are on the three strikes & you're out system. I'm not a ban-happy mod, I rarely (if ever) put the mod hat on, and I really don't like to. So let's play nice, okay?

Other communities you may be interested in:
formerassassins, more_than_one, multiplicity, nonstupidplural, from_fiction sbtalk, silentmultiples, soul_assemblage, soulbonding, soulbond_domain, spiritcompanion and spiritrealms.
(If you know of another related community you think should be added to the list feel free to let me know)

-Nothing (a_view_so_cruel)